silent lunches were so….weird. like the entire cafeteria was expected to be quiet and it usually was a punishment for something super dumb tbh like i remember a bunch of kids popped plastic bags one day so we got silent lunch for a week and everyone was just….sitting there all quiet. it was duuuumb
the only funny part tho was sitting around ur friends and all of u trying VERY VERY HARD not to laugh when someone makes a face or something like that, or trying to sneak into the bathroom so u can talk…even then tho fuck silent lunches
ppl keep going “what the FUCK is a silent lunch why would schools have that” and im like. genuinely so forgetful abt the fact that silent lunches are one of those american public school things that literally dont make any sense
My school would make you sit in alphabetical order…
I often refer to my bottle-raised lamb as my adopted daughter, because it’s mostly true, it temporarily keeps nosy strangers from knowing I’m an eeeevil childfree woman, and it’s hilarious when people find out. And by that time they’re usually too disturbed by the “her-daughter-is-a-sheep” thing to get on my case about the “woman-with-no-husband-or-kids-oh-the-horror” thing.
Most of my friends are aware that I do this, and will back me up in conversations without batting an eye when I reference my daughter. And the best part is that they literally never drop the story. They just 100% all the time accept that I have a two-year-old adopted daughter. The fact that she happens to be a sheep is an unimportant detail, not worth mentioning until an anecdote gets too weird to plausibly be about a human toddler.
Which actually takes much longer than you’d think, since human toddlers apparently have absolutely zero sense. “She bites if you stop paying attention to her” is believable, “she tries to eat rocks out of the landscaping” is believable, “she stuck her head through a fence and couldn’t get out” is believable. “She jumped a five foot fence and came screaming back into the house through the dog door when I left her outside in the pasture” does get some strange looks, though usually not for the right reason.
Occasionally the joke gets turned around on me, though. I posted a picture on my not-tumblr blog of her wearing my glasses, and every comment was “Oh my gosh she looks just like you!!!” “I would never have known she was adopted If you hadn’t told me!!” “Are you sure that’s not an old picture of you?!”
a) The word “illegalize” does not exist within the English language, to make something illegal is called “criminalizing” it, legalizing it means to turn something illegal into a legal action
RecursiveCollapse 